I’m at a bit of a loss on how to begin this post - the title is a bit dramatic, no? I guess I’ll just break it down by time and see where that gets me. Have patience:
YESTERDAY Yesterday was my last day of work in the Performing Arts department at the Walker Art Center, my last day in Deskjobville. I was a puppy when I started there five years ago, and now I’m a bitter, jaded, crone. Kidding. Mostly. I’m still friendly and fresh-faced, I just know a hell of a lot more now than I did then and I’ve gained some snarkiness, to boot. If I hadn’t been absolutely slammed with work yesterday, I might have gotten all choked up about it.
At the end of the day my department threw me an incredible going-away shindig backstage at the McGuire, Hollywood style - there were stars on the floor and there was champagne and chocolate and paparazzi and cake and wine and roses and sunglasses and a feather boa and bouncers and my headshot plastered everywhere and tons of people. And there were speeches, and there was a goodbye card in the form of a filmstrip with beautiful parting words from everyone. I was honored and deeply touched. And had I not been so surprised by the whole thing and overjoyed to see everyone, I might have gotten all choked up about it.
When I finally got home I was so overwhelmed that all I could do was read the good-bye messages, run myself a hot bath, sit in it and have a good cry. I'm going to miss my people.
TODAY After spending most of the night fitfully dreaming about work, I woke up with an e-mail to my department colleagues already crafted in my head (I gave them the official hand-made farewell cards yesterday…don’t want you to think I’d send that kind of message via e-mail – that's tacky). After sending it off (had to get those loose ends out of my brain), I fully realized that I am now a full-time artist.
I answered a couple of sweet congratulatory e-mails this morning welcoming me to my new life (thank you!), thought of different ways to write this particular post, did my dishes, cleaned my living room, arranged last night’s roses into a nice vase, and started packing for tomorrow’s mini-break.
This feels good. And it feels right. Finally.